I love thee agreeably -- enough to let your stinky dog hide on the bed after a run through damp leaves, mud and slug infested gardens.

I love thee steadfastly -- enough to devote a year to raising you from a wobbly speck into a strong healthy adult (who promptly attempts to seize control).

I love thee passionately -- despite your repeated efforts to probe my ears, eyes and mouth with the same tongue you use for various other atrocities.

I love thee well -- despite the amazing odors you produce.

I love thee deeply -- though you use me as a napkin at every opportunity.

I love thee madly -- despite the various bodily functions you have performed at inappropriate moments and in inappropriate places.

I love thee constantly -- despite the dog "bladder curfew" I have lived by for many years.

I love thee truly -- despite the "doggie land mines" hidden in the grass.

I love thee absolutely -- because you never (well, hardly ever) hog the remote control.

I love thee gratefully -- because you stay by my side (or on my side).

I love thee devotedly -- more than clean carpeting, clothing, furniture, floors or walls.

I love thee bravely -- enough to battle the indomitable flea on your behalf.

I love thee monetarily -- enough to put the vet's children through college.

I love thee openly -- I will bear any embarrassment for your furry sake.

I love thee totally -- more than free time, excess cash or a predictable life.